ONE
The final dying sounds of their dress rehearsal left the Laurel Players with  nothing to do but stand there, silent and helpless, blinking out over the footlights  of an empty auditorium. They hardly dared to breathe as the short, solemn figure  of their director emerged from the naked seats to join them on stage, as he pulled  a stepladder raspingly from the wings and climbed halfway up its rungs to turn and  tell them, with several clearings of his throat, that they were a damned talented  group of people and a wonderful group of people to work with.
"It hasn't been an  easy job," he said, his glasses glinting soberly around the stage. "We've had a lot  of problems here, and quite frankly I'd more or less resigned myself not to expect  too much. Well, listen. Maybe this sounds corny, but something happened up here tonight.  Sitting out there tonight I suddenly knew, deep down, that you were all putting your  hearts into your work for the first time." He let the fingers of one hand splay out  across the pocket of his shirt to show what a simple, physical thing the heart was;  then he made the same hand into a fist, which he shook slowly and wordlessly in a  long dramatic pause, closing one eye and allowing his moist lower lip to curl out  in a grimace of triumph and pride. "Do that again tomorrow night," he said, "and  we'll have one hell of a show."
They could have wept with relief. Instead, trembling,  they cheered and laughed and shook hands and kissed one another, and somebody went  out for a case of beer and they all sang songs around the auditorium piano until  the time came to agree, unanimously, that they'd better knock it off and get a good  night's sleep.
"See you tomorrow!" they called, as happy as children, and riding  home under the moon they found they could roll down the windows of their cars and  let the air in, with its health-giving smells of loam and young flowers. It was the  first time many of the Laurel Players had allowed themselves to acknowledge the coming  of spring.
The year was 1955 and the place was a part of western Connecticut where  three swollen villages had lately been merged by a wide and clamorous highway called  Route Twelve. The Laurel Players were an amateur company, but a costly and very serious  one, carefully recruited from among the younger adults of all three towns, and this  was to be their maiden production. All winter, gathering in one anther's living rooms  for excited talks about Ibsen and Shaw and O'Neill, and then for the show of hands  in which a common-sense majority chose The Petrified Forest, and then for preliminary  casting, they had felt their dedication growing stronger every week. They might privately  consider their director a funny little man (and he was, in a way: he seemed incapable  of any but a very earnest manner of speaking, and would often conclude his remarks  with a little shake of the head that caused his cheeks to wobble) but they liked  and respected him, and they fully believed in most of the things he said. "Any play  deserves the best that any actor has to give," he'd told them once, and another time:  "Remember this. We're not just putting on a play here. We're establishing a community  theater, and that's a pretty important thing to be doing."
The trouble was that  from the very beginning they had been afraid they would end by making fools of themselves,  and they had compounded that fear by being afraid to admit it. At first their rehearsals  had been held on Saturdays--always, it seemed, on the kind of windless February or  March afternoon when the sky is white, the trees are black, and the brown fields  and hummocks of the earth lie naked and tender between curds of shriveled snow. The  Players, coming out of their various kitchen doors and hesitating for a minute to  button their coats or pull on their gloves, would see a landscape in which only a  few very old, weathered houses seemed to belong; it made their own homes look as  weightless and impermanent, as foolishly misplaced as a great many bright new toys  that had been left outdoors overnight and rained on. Their automobiles didn't look  right either--unnecessarily wide and gleaming in the colors of candy and ice cream,  seeming to wince at each splatter of mud, they crawled apologetically down the broken  roads that led from all directions to the deep, level slab of Route Twelve. Once  there the cars seemed able to relax in an environment all their own, a long bright  valley of colored plastic and plate glass and stainless steel--KING KONE, MOBILGAS,  SHOPORAMA, EAT--but eventually they had to turn off, one by one, and make their way  up the winding country road that led to the central high school; they had to pull  up and stop in the quiet parking lot outside the high-school auditorium.
"Hi!" the  Players would shyly call to one another.
"Hi! . . ." "Hi! . . ." And they'd go reluctantly  inside.
Clumping their heavy galoshes around the stage, blotting at their noses  with Kleenex and frowning at the unsteady print of their scripts, they would disarm  each other at last with peals of forgiving laughter, and they would agree, over and  over, that there was plenty of time to smooth the thing out. But there wasn't plenty  of time, and they all knew it, and a doubling and redoubling of their rehearshal  schedule seemed only to make matters worse. Long after the time had come for what  the director called "really getting this thing off the ground; really making it happen,"  it remained a static, shapeless, inhumanly heavy weight; time and again they read  the promise of failure in each other's eyes, in the apologetic nods and smiles of  their parting and the spastic haste with which they broke for their cars and drove  home to whatever older, less explicit promises of failure might lie in wait for them  there.
And now tonight, with twenty-four hours to go, they had somehow managed to  bring it off. Giddy in the unfamiliar feel of make-up and costumes on this first  warm evening of the year, they had forgotten to be afraid: they had let the movement  of the play come and carry them and break like a wave; and maybe it sounded corny  (and what if it did?) but they had all put their hearts into their work. Could anyone  ever ask for more than that?
The audience, arriving in a long clean serpent of cars  the following night, were very serious too. Like the Players, they were mostly on  the young side of middle age, and they were attractively dressed in what the New  York clothing stores describe as Country Casuals. Anyone could see they were a better  than average crowd, in terms of education and employment and good health, and it  was clear too that they considered this a significant evening. They all knew, of  course, and said so again and again as they filed inside and took their seats, that  The Petrified Forest was hardly one of the world's great plays. But it was, after  all, a fine theater piece with a basic point of view that was every bit as valid  today as in the thirties ("Even more valid," one man kept telling his wife, who chewed  her lips and nodded, seeing what he meant; "even more valid, when you think about  it"). The main thing, though, was not the play itself but the company--the brave  idea of it, the healthy, hopeful sound of it: the birth of a really good community  theater right here, among themselves. This was what had drawn them, enough of them  to fill more than half the auditorium, and it was what held them hushed and tense  in readiness for pleasure as the house lights dimmed.
The curtain went up on a set  whose rear wall was still shaking with the impact of a stagehand's last-minute escape,  and the first few lines of dialogue were blurred by the scrape and bang of accidental  offstage noises. These small disorders were signs of a mounting hysteria among the  Laurel Players, but across the foot-lights they seemed only to add to a sense of  impending excellence. They seemed to say, engagingly: Wait a minute; it hasn't really  started yet. We're all a little nervous here, but please bear with us. And soon there  was no further need for apologies, for the audience was watching the girl who played  the heroine, Gabrielle.
Her name was April Wheeler, and she caused the whispered  word "lovely" to roll out over the auditorium the first time she walked across the  stage. A little later there were hopeful nudges and whispers of "She's good," and  there were stately nods of pride among the several people who happened to know that  she had attended one of the leading dramatic schools of New York less than ten years  before. She was twenty-nine, a tall ash blonde with a patrician kind of beauty that  no amount of amateur lighting could distort, and she seemed ideally cast in the role.  It didn't even matter that bearing two children had left her a shade too heavy in  the hips and thighs, for she moved with the shyly sensual grace of maidenhood; anyone  happening to glance at Frank Wheeler, the round-faced, intelligent-looking young  man who sat biting his fist in the last row of the audience, would have said he looked  more like her suitor than her husband.
"Sometimes I can feel as if I were sparkling  all over," she was saying, "and I want to go out and do something that's absolutely  crazy, and marvelous . . ."
Backstage, huddled and listening, the other actors suddenly  loved her. Or at least they were prepared to love her, even those who had resented  her occasional lack of humility at rehearsals, for she was suddenly the only hope  they had.
The leading man had come down with a kind of intestinal flu that morning.  He had arrived at the theater in a high fever, insisting that he felt well enough  to go on, but five minutes before curtain time he had begun to vomit in his dressing  room, and there had been nothing for the director to do but send him home and take  over the role himself. The thing happened so quickly that nobody had time to think  of going out front to announce the substitution; a few of the minor actors didn't  even know about it until they heard the director's voice out there in the lights,  speaking the familiar words they'd expected to hear from the other man. He was doing  his fervent best and delivering each line with a high semi-professional finish, but  there was no denying that he looked all wrong in the part of Alan Squiers--squat  and partly bald and all but unable to see without his glasses, which he'd refused  to wear on stage. From the moment of his entrance he had caused the supporting actors  to interrupt each other and forget where to stand, and now in the middle of his important  first-act speech about his own futility--"Yes, brains without purpose; noise without  sound; shape without substance--" one of his gesturing hands upset a glass of water  that flooded the table. He tried to cover it with a giggle and a series of improvised  lines--"You see? That's how useless I am. Here, let me help you wipe it up--" but  the rest of the speech was ruined. The virus of calamity, dormant and threatening  all these weeks, had erupted now and spread from the helplessly vomiting man until  it infected everyone in the cast but April Wheeler.
"Wouldn't you like to be loved  by me?" she was saying.
"Yes, Gabrielle," said the director, gleaming with sweat.  "I should like to be loved by you."
"You think I'm attractive?"
Under the table  the director's leg began to jiggle up and down on the spring of its flexed foot.  "There are better words than that for what you are."
"Then why don't we at least  make a start at it?"
She was working alone, and visibly weakening with every line.  Before the end of the first act the audience could tell as well as the Players that  she'd lost her grip, and soon they were all embarrassed for her. She had begun to  alternate between false theatrical gestures and a white-knuckled immobility; she  was carrying her shoulders high and square, and despite her heavy make-up you could  see the warmth of humiliation rising in her face and neck.
Then came the bouncing  entrance of Shep Campbell, the burly young red-haired engineer who played the gangster,  Duke Mantee. The whole company had worried about Shep from the beginning, but he  and his wife Milly, who had helped with the props and the publicity, were such enthusiastic  and friendly people that nobody'd had the heart to suggest replacing him. The result  of this indulgence now, and of Campbell's own nervous guilt about it, was that he  forgot one of his key lines, said others in a voice so quick and faint that it couldn't  be heard beyond the sixth row, and handled himself less like an outlaw than an obliging  grocery clerk, bobbing head, rolled-up sleeves and all.
At intermission the audience  straggled out to smoke and wander in uncomfortable groups around the high-school  corridor, examining the high-school bulletin board and wiping damp palms down their  slim-cut trousers and their graceful cotton skirts. None of them wanted to go back  and go through with the second and final act, but they all did.
And so did the Players,  whose one thought now, as plain as the sweat on their faces, was to put the whole  sorry business behind them as fast as possible. It seemed to go on for hours, a cruel  and protracted endurance test in which April Wheeler's performance was as bad as  the others, if not worse. At the climax, where the stage directions call for the  poignance of the death scene to be punctuated with shots from outside and bursts  from duke's Tommy gun, Shep Campbell timed his bursts so sloppily, and the answering  off-stage gunfire was so much too loud, that all the lovers' words were lost in a  deafening smoky shambles. When the curtain fell at last it was an act of mercy.
The applause, not loud, was conscientiously long enough to permit two curtain calls,  one that caught all the Players in motion as they walked to the wings, turned back  and collided with one another, and another that revealed the three principals in  a brief tableau of human desolation: the director blinking myopically, Shep Campbell  looking appropriately fierce for the first time all evening, April Wheeler paralyzed  in a formal smile.								
									 Copyright © 2000 by Richard Yates. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.